Reports citing emergency dispatch audio said responders were called to McConnell’s residence on June 14 for an unconscious patient and later discussed “CPR in progress” for a possible cardiac emergency.
Oh! So, we’ve escalated from him being found unconscious and rushed to the hospital to active CPR? Wouldn’t it have been something if the Republican stance of allowing doctors to decline giving medical care on moral grounds ended up being applied against the interests of the long-term cancer that is McConnell?
No, no, CPR hurts like a motherfucker. Let him enjoy that for a while.
Not only does it hurt, it basically always guarantees broken ribs if done correctly. Especially in a decrepit 84yo man whose bones are already weak.
No broken ribs for Mitch. He has an exoskeleton.
This is a misconception. A turtle’s shell is its ribcage, and it’s not technically an exoskeleton, because it’s covered by a thin layer of skin and scales.
Do turtle shells move when they respire?
Nope.
The tense of this verb makes me uncomfortable. Please say “breathe” in the future.
THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER
eww no, that even looks worse
If I put rubber and paint on a suit of exo-power armor that doesn’t make it concealed armor. The turtle have exo-skeletons!
Crack them ribs!